Today was a rough day. It was my stay at home day with Logan and I didn't feel good.
I think it has to do with premenstrual hormone misbalances, ugh. I didn't feel like doing much. Just drink coffee and eat junk and spending some time with my little one. Usually we go out for a stroll or a trip to the grocery store. But today playing in our garden was enough for me. Even though I preferred to take my son out I stayed in my safe spot. There was a little mom guilt and thoughts about me being a bad mom inside my head. But I dealt with it. It's not like I'm this way every week and I know we would get our quality time when I felt better.
Thinking about the positivity in my life can help me stay on track. If I don't, I know letting my situation deteriorate could possible lead to a downwards spiral towards depression. But these days I know what signs to look for. I talk about how I feel early enough so I can try to change some things that arent't going the way I want or are too much and take it slow for a while.
Finding gratefulness and meaning in little things can help me focus on the good.
Solid as a rockThere is one person in my life who has been there in my darkest days and didn't runaway: my husband. When things would get tough he would always said that he wouldn't just walk out on me. And he has kept his promise. I'm very lucky to have such an understanding partner in my life and I know not to take that for granted.
NeatfreakinessBeing organized is a bit of a challenge for me these days. But I still can appreciate a perfectly organized wardrobe or bookshelf. Or....an organized platter of fruits and veggies.
Aren't they photo genetic? As a former perfectionist seeing something this organized can really make me happy. It doesn't stay pretty like this for long though so it's good I took a picture.
And here are some more.
Having my house organized and tidy helps me to keep my head clear. I don't want too much distraction around me that can make me feel agitated or uncomfortable.
Happy kid, happy mommy
In the picture above we went to see trains which are his most favorite things in the world.
Seeing him happy makes me happy. Motherhood and parenting a toddler has his ups and downs. My husband and I made an agreement to ask for me-time when feeling overwhelmed. This way we keep each other and our family balanced.
So there are a few main things I can hold on to when I'm feeling not as good as I want to.
I like to stay home in my safe haven and just be with my family then. There are definitely more great friends and family members in my life who I enjoy to hang out with. But I know social commitments can really tire me out when I feel crappy. Maybe it's still that feeling of not being able to be as I feel because I had trouble with that before? So I know I'm better of lying low for a while till the darker days have past.
I'd love to hear how you guys deal with difficult days.
Want to read more about depression?
How to find the right therapist to help you fight depression
How I conquered my depression